Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: The Analysis

Warning: Spoilers, spoilers, and more spoilers.

Oops… I did it again. I binge watched nearly 3 seasons of chick flicks … got lost in the show… 

The case in point is Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, a musical series, and here’s a rapid fire about our heroine, Rebecca Bunch:

“She was working hard at a New York job making dough but it made her blue, one day she was crying a lot and so she decided to move to… West Covina, California! Brand-new pals and new career. It happens to be where Josh lives, but that’s not why she’s here…”

The adulteress

Rebecca moves to West Covina, home of her childhood sweetheart- Josh Chan– that cruelly dump her last day of summer camp many years ago. Despite her initial denial, we all know the truth- she’s in West Covina for Josh.

Not long later, she discovers that Josh has a girlfriend- Valentia. However, this plays no deterrence to her affection and constant seduction of Josh. This flagrant dismissal of Valentia as Josh’s girlfriend leaves a nasty taste in my mouth, much like Emily Griffin’s book Something Borrowed, where the heroine (?) shamelessly steals her best friend’s fiancé. Of course, Emily portrays the best friend as “manipulative”, and the supposing antagonist. But perspective is a powerful fulcrum, and protagonist is just one viewpoint tweak away from antagonist.

Photo credit: www.imdb.com

Similarly, Valentia is painted as mean, and unappreciative of Josh, as if that somehow justifies Rebecca’s pursuance of a taken man (although it is interesting to note that Rebecca and Valentia eventually become good friends). Some, in the spirit of hedonism, might applaud Rebecca’s pursuit for love and happiness, but I am substantially troubled. I consider Valentia the victim.

Anyway, Rebecca eventually realise the err in her ways, which she express through the song I’m the Villian in My Own Story:

But even after her warm for Josh is over, her man-stealing days aren’t. She had a committed relationship with Nathaniel, her boss-turns-enemy-turns-boyfriend-turns-ex-turns-co-boss-turns-F-buddy, that she eventually breaks off for mental health reasons. He gets a new girlfriend, but Rebecca and Nathaniel continue to bone… and bone… and bone for another 8 months. At one point, she even laments that this affair is the healthiest relationship she ever had, an attestation that she harbours no remorse about banging another girl’s man. But does her unstable mental state give her a free pass? I don’t know.

The narrative doesn’t frown on infidelity. I love Rebecca and Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, but this element is questionable.

“I’m just a girl in love, I can’t be held responsible for my actions… I have no underlying issues to address, I’m certifiably cute and adorably obsessed… they say love makes you crazy, therefore you can’t call her crazy… when you call her crazy, you’re just calling her in love!”

The feminist factor

Rebecca Bunch is a feminist, there’s no question about that, and the show has an underlying feminism theme.

What? The girl who ditched her lucrative city job, zapped across the country, relocates herself, purely for a guy, is an advocate for female empowerment??

Yes.

Feminism has been redefined over the years, the by-product when scores of opinionated women roar (I am woman, hear me roar!). Humour my brand of feminism, when I say it’s one’s freedom to choose. The power to marry or not, have kids or not, cook or not, wear yoga pants or not.

To phrase it differently, a woman may say “I choose to be a stay-home mum, not because of society’s definition of woman, but because of my personal decision to concentrate on my family,” which is worlds apart from “women should stay home to clean, cook and care for the kids on pure virtue of their gender”. Also, “I need a man to provide for me” is vastly different from “we have our individual role to play in this relationship, independent of our respective gender”.

Therefore, I support, applaud, even, Rebecca’s right to, yes, bolt across the country, desert her conventionally-defined success, in hopes of reigniting the spark she once shared with her ex-boyfrined from 10 years ago.

On a side note, there is nothing weak or antifeminist about loving someone who doesn’t love you back. I adore how Louise Brealey blunts it out. After backlash on her character, Molly Hooper‘s unrequited love for Sherlock Holmes on Sherlock, she tweets:

Photo credit: Louise Brealey and twitter

“Loving someone after years is not reductive, retrograde, antifeminist or weak. Fight the patriarchy, not me, and read some f****** Chekhov”.

Not that Rebecca is not madly in love with Josh Chan, of course, more like passionately obsessed. But her mental health is not the point here (important issue as it is), rather we emphasise on women’s journey for the sweet spot.

Consistent with a woman’s right to decide, is her journey in search for her individual ideal. We don’t want armies of empty-headed feminine warriors. Instead, we yearn for platoons of strong, independent women, whose decisions are made from rationalisation, and not directly influenced by society’s expectations. For the ability to think, rationalise and make decisions, are the foundation that will prop up the feminist movement.

And to arrive there, one must journey, search, make mistakes.

To quote Huffington Post, “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend is doing something far more complicated than simply ironically reclaiming, or accidentally reinforcing, a sexist insult: It’s limning the gap between how far women have come in our ideals and expectations, and how far society has actually progressed. Rebecca is a bad feminist, in the Roxane Gay sense; she holds feminist beliefs, and can easily articulate them, but her entire social self is at war with her ideals. She wants things she knows a feminist “shouldn’t,” and she admires qualities she knows define traditional femininity.” (Or as Holly Bourne calls it- cognitive dissonance)

And one has the right to be a bad feminist, because that is what feminism is all about, once again- the right to choose. And as Roxane Gay said, “I would rather be a bad feminist than no feminist at all.”- Let women think.

The RELATIONSHIPS

I’ll spare the Megillah and lay it down: I ship #grebecca (Greg and Rebecca) so hard, sigh- shit show though, their relationship was. First, she “whores” (her words, not mine) herself to him at Bean’s party, in an attempt to locate Josh.

Then, she proceeds to brush off his advances, over and over again. Ever felt like sticking your hands through the laptop screen to give a movie character a dire shake? Wake up, you blind chick! It’s the best friend! It’s the best friend! (Greg is Josh’s best friend)

Finally, she offers him a pitiful minute and agrees to a date, after this very sexy rendition of Settle for Me:

The date is great, so swell (even if not perfect) so she HAD to wreck it by claiming banging rights with another guy. Get this right: she ditched Greg during their date, and brought home another guy to screw.

Uhuh, chicks’ got issues.

But Greg eventually forgives her- speak of amazing in a flannel shirt.

Later, she discovers how much he cares about her, and hence began a series of marathon sex. So much sex, actually, that she contracts a UTI (Urinary Track Infection):

And because people in general suck at keeping sex and love separate, she (alas) falls for him!

And then complications knock. Josh and Valentia break up, and Rebecca gets a bite of the forbidden fruit- Josh.

Greg. Josh. Greg, Josh. Greg… Josh… Greg? Josh?

What’s a girl to do when she’s stuck in between men?:

But he producers intend to write Greg off, and they do- he hops on a plane for Evory. When Santino Fontana (actor that portrays Greg) left Crazy Ex, I was miserable. Crushed. Dejected. Grief-stricken.

Life lost meaning.

So now, Greg is gone, and only Josh remains- convenient for the producers’ plan to rid all love triangles.

Please, anybody but Josh, I pray (my personal opinion, which is surprising, given my staunch support for Asians in Hollywood). It’s nothing personal, only that Rebecca needs a man with backbone, which Josh seems to pathetically lack- partially due to his pattern of serial monogamy.

Oh, what does the future hold?

… And then they spring Nathaniel on us. (He’s the one in the middle.)

P.S.: I don’t blame you for watching that video on repeat. Not that I did. Ahem.

But can six packs extinguish the Greg torch?

Quintis: A Scorpion Love Story

P.S: Based on CBS’s Scorpion.

P.P.S: Brimming with spoilers.

P.P.P.S: Consider yourself warned!

Photo credit: www.pinterest.com

Like soya and cincau.

Roti and dhal.

Chocolate and peanut butter.

Behaviourist and mechanical prodigy.

Toby and Happy.

Who knew romantic endeavours of the emotionally stunted could be so strangely entertaining.

“People only let you down,” says Happy. “You put a quarter-inch wrench on a quarter-inch bolt, it works. Tools don’t let you down.” Toby replies, “spending your life scared to connect to anyone isn’t any way to live.” (S1E2)

The couple go way back as friends. They regularly make bets, mostly at Slyvester’s expense; or exchange witty banter, at mutual expense.

Toby’s affection for Happy is painfully patent. When former colleague turned psychotic enemy- Mark Collins takes a swipe at Happy for a supposing mistake, Toby jumps in like the freaking Calvary in a fedora. “Hey, Collins, you lay off her or we have an issue.” Dayyuum, sister. (S1E5)

Towards the end of that episode, Walter (head genius) playfully tease her. “Toby going after Collins to protect your honour… what was that all about?” She shrug and responds. “The shrinks’ crazier than all of us. What a surprise.”

But her silent afterthought suggest more. She steals a peep across the room where Toby is reading two books simultaneously- because, genius, duh- and he catches her eye. They share a wordless tender moment, free of intellectual jargon and facetious insults.

Swoon-ville, guys!

Gif credit: www.scorpionedit.tunblr.com

The inappropriate wisecracks doesn’t stop though- “Dear Lord, thank you for this gift.” Gift: Happy’s ass. (S1E9)

Nor does his thoughtful yet arguably misguided tactics to please Happy- like hacking into social services for her family records, painful nerve that it is to her. (S1E7)

will toby grow a pair and ask happy out?

Then he finally musters the courage to ask her out. He scores 2 tickets to a monster truck show, because where else would you take a machine-obsessed mechanical whizz?

But Freudian displacement, a.k.a. being a first class chicken render the dude a tad bit slow. As he turns away to retrieve the prized ducats, Happy is distracted by the shiny new musician- Peyton Temple.

“Can I ask you something crazy… you’ve got plans tonight?” Peyton fix Happy with hopeful eyes. An eavesdropping Toby is evidently dejected.

“Are you into drag races?” Happy ask cautiously. “… There’s a rally in Pomona…”

“Wanna go?” ask Peyton.

“Yeah, why not?”

You know what they say, Toby? Chics dig musicians. (S1E8)

Gif credit: www.scorpionedit.tumblr.com
declaration of love

But ego maniac psychiatrists don’t give up.

-Because Season 1 Episode 10 brings Toby’s first vocal declaration of his feelings for Happy.

During a mission, they are separated from the group with no food, water, or idea where they are. Happy injures her leg during a tumble into strategically-located ravine.

Toby finally convince her to let him check out her injury, being a M.D. and all (note: psychiatrists, not to be confused with psychologist, ARE medical doctors).

He pulls off her boot and gives her feet a worried look. This is the realest we’ve seen Toby to date. He even ignores Happy’s foot fetish remark.

“…Why are you a shrink?” Asked Happy.

“If you must know,  my mother was nuts. She was clinically bipolar. And I watched my dad struggle to manage her illness, so I became a shrink to try to help them both.” Toby replies quietly.

And then, because he’s Toby, adds, “Geez, Happy, you know that there are whole sections of the internet that would pay top dollar for a peek at those toes.”

Appalled, Happy spits, “Why do you do that? As soon as you become human, you switch to wise-ass.”

Eyes still focused on dressing her wound, Toby says, “it’s a textbook defence mechanism to hide how I feel.” He finally raises his gaze to meet hers, but only for a second. “…Especially around you… I say stupid things to hide feelings that you already know I have. And we got no food, water, or idea where we are, so if we’re gonna die, I might as well say some stuff, so there.”

My shipping heart is palpitating like crazy!

But because this is clever television, the heartstring-manipulation ends there, but not before the episode finale:

Gif credit: www.scorpionedit.tumblr.com

And Toby always has a felicitous reply:

Gif credit: www.scorpionedit.tumblr.com
How does happy feel about toby?

As the series progress, we note that Toby’s feelings are finally requited, or is it? When Slyvester gets seriously injured during a case, Toby is unfocused and distracted. He rushes out the garage in a flush of frustration… with Happy on his heels. (S1E11)

She is genuinely concerned… But no romantic development…

… Until Season 1 Episode 16. While offering Ralph romantic advice (because 10 year olds need those), Toby says “… some girls don’t know a good thing when it’s right in front of them, no matter how many times it has been offered.” How convenient that Happy happens to be working right there.

She shoots him a sidewards glance, holding some form of handheld metal structure over a bunsen burner. A burst of flame, followed by a cloud of smoke shoots up.

“Maybe she doesn’t want to jeopardise your friendship. Maybe she’s never had a best friend like you before and that probably means a lot to her… You just have to be patient.” She delivers another look in Toby’s direction.

Obviously we’re not talking about Ralph anymore. Poor Ralph.

Gif credit: www.scorpionedit.tumblr.com

They decide to seal the deal for Ralph in the romance department by displaying a radiant show of fireworks for his special lady. And as we all know, when there is pyrotechnics, there is brewing love.

Photo credit: www.happy-x-toby.tumblr.com

Yup, that happened! Oooooooo…

Followed by…

Photo credit: www.spoitlertv.com

Just as Toby leans in to steal a smooch from his special lady, they are interrupted by upset lady teacher screaming about the danger of fireworks on school grounds. Rude!

But then 2 episodes, later…

“Doc! Come here a minute,” calls Happy.

He saunters over. “What’s up?”…

… She grabs him…

… THEN PLANTS ON HIM A GINORMOUS SNOG!!

Oh, be still my fluttering heart! (S1E18)

 

ask her out already, will you?

So what do you do after a beautiful woman kisses you?

Ask her out, abuden.

Happy bets she can fly her paper airplane “down the telephone wires, straight at ground level, across the street, and through a window.” (S1E19)

So the gambling addict (Toby) says, “you’re on. If I win, dinner date. If you win, I’ll do your laundry for a  month.” Win-win for you, huh, Toby?

Photo credit: www.spoilertv.siteblogs.com

Happy will win. I can see it in her eyes. The paper plane drifts down the balcony, rides the breeze, across the street…

… Where a truck materialises out of nowhere and giveth her flight path an abrupt end.

“… We be dating…” Toby says with raised eyebrows.

Photo caption: www.weheartit.com

But the end of the episode brings a new wager. Toby says,”If I win, you take me to dinner. And if (you win), I take you.”

Happy toss the paper airplane across the road, and neither of them even looked.

Imma dying!

So the dinner date is set in stone. Dream come true for Toby, right?

Then he HAD to oversleep and miss the date. (S1E20)

To do list after standing up a girl with abandonment issues:

  1. Bring her “wrench” bouquet and box of “nuts”
  2. Grovel
  3. Grovel on repeat

Things to expect after standing up a girl with abandonment issues:

  1. Forgiveness Eternal rage

Well, hell hath no furry like a woman’s wrath.

But love stricken shrinks don’t give up, do they?

No, they don’t. They persist through snarky swipes and blatant rejection.

And then in Season 2, we hear a name drop- Chet.

Happy chatting on the phone with Chet.

Happy going to the club to meet with Chet.

Happy ridding into the garage on the back of a motorcycle with Chet.

Happy sure is spending a chunky amount of time with Chet.

Gif credit: www.scorpionedit.tumblr.com

Toby drown his pain in bouts of physically punishing boxing routines. That is, punishing to watch.

OOOfff….

To be fair, he’s not that bad. Yours truly has been on the receiving end of numerous jabs. That ringing that last for ages, the inability to open one’s mouth past a conservative 30 degrees, the inner lip cuts from, you know, boxing with teeth braces.

I learnt my lessons- keep hands up. Toby learnt his lesson too…

… that the “more manly, less academic” strategy doesn’t work with Happy?

But first, he is determined to trail her to a club. Because “I just needs to see Happy happy with Chet, and then… I can move on.” (S2E8)

I’m gearing myself up for another boxing match. This time, Toby vs. Chet, when they (Toby, Walter, Sylvester and Cabe) walk into… a comedy club? And this…

What?! That was actually more painful to watch than Toby’s boxing match.

But his black eye from earlier that day gives him clarity, because he says “Chet isn’t her boyfriend. He’s her comedy coach… You know, all this time, Happy and I were doing the same thing. We were subconsciously replacing the risk our relationship represented. I got into a ring, where I had no business being. And Happy, the world’s unfunniest person, tried to make strangers laugh. We were replacing what we lost when we lost each other. That excitement of risk. This means that deep inside her there is a seedling of regret”.

Gif credit: www.sporpionedit.tumblr.com

And give her space, he does. Finally. Imagine my surprise.

But the feelings game is still strong

In Season 2 Episode 12, they share a dance so sweet, my heart melted, and I had to gather the liquified remains in a glass jar.

During an assignment, the team returns to college, where Toby is determined to have the ultimate college experience this time. But, as usual, events go south, leaving him disappointed.

So Happy beefs up some tunes from her car, and tells him, “you can check one thing off your college bucket list… the dance.” They link hands, and after a couple of awkward-ish steps, she leans against his shoulders.

“What are you doing?” He’s pleasantly surprised.

“Letting my guard down.”

Screams!

Things are really starting to pick up pace here. In the very next episode (S2E13), Happy nearly drowns. Toby wants to jump in after her, but Cabe “don’t be an idiot” him. When they finally pull her suffocated and shivering body from the water, Toby is stricken with worry. There, soaking wet, they share wordless-tender-moment 2.0.

But the best is yet to come, guys, because after 17 whole episodes, they finally share steamy kiss, part 2!

“plausible deniability” ends now

The team is roped into a mission in the heart of Antartica (S2E14). Fix antenna, connect to satellite and get out of there in 2 minutes, right? Wrong.

And the wrong turns wrong-er when Happy is separated from the group in the mother of blizzards.

Guess what did Toby do? Correct- he advanced like a mad man into the -40 degrees cold and dancing ice in search for the love of his life.

“Happy!” he calls. “Happy!”

“Toby! Doc!” she screams. No answer. But yes- ravine that she tumbles into like a snooker ball into billiard table hole.

Not good.

In a fit of rage, she throws her “saying yes to life” book by Quincy Berkstead (Toby’s nemesis) out of the hole. As probability have it, Toby stumbles upon the strangely dry reading material, which lead him to the popsicle-equivalent happy, sitting there unconscious and motionless.

He jumps down the ravine like bat man minus the grace.

In an attempt to warm her up, he makes history- by getting naked with Happy Quinn in a sleeping bag.

Oooolalahh..

so what do we know so far?

We know that Toby is head over heels in love with Happy. No points for that answer.

We know that he will do anything for her, which includes, but is not limited to, defending her against a crazy lunatic, voluntarily getting sucked into a turbine despite the 100% chance of being cut to pieces, and freezing to death in Antartica.

We also know that Happy is falling for Toby. Wait… what?

Yup, right out of the horse’s mouth. (S2E15)

We know that he launched into a series of petty fights with Walter, which landed the duo in “couples therapy” (S2E17).

We know that Walter showed up at Toby’s doorstep to apologise.

We know Toby admitted to his tendency to self-destruct when the going is smooth for him. “… I’ve never been happier in my life, I don’t know how to handle that, so I become a pain in the tuchas.”

We know the two made up.

We know Toby turned down Walter’s offer to hang out at Kovelsky’s on account of needing rest.

We know that as he closed the door of his apartment, a feminine voice said, “Really doc? You’ve really never been happier?”- Happy! Actually, Happy in a bathrobe, in what is clearly post coitus bliss.

He walks over to her, huge smile plastered across his face. “God as my witness, I’m not gonna do anything to ruin this.”

Gentle acoustic melody plays as they wrap their arms around each other and engage in a sweet lip-lock.

We know that IT finally happened.

We know that Quintis (Quinn and Curtis) has come to pass!

Jane the Virgin: Genre Statutes

 

Photo credit: www.tvline.com

There are rules to the genre.

Life is ridden with monotone, tears and pain. In fact, these very realities accentuate the appeal of television; the option to subscribe to a desired tone of mood. To escape reality. The freedom to choose if you want to pee in your pants (horror), grip the sofa till it rips (thriller), choke on your saliva in fits of laughter (comedy), plant your heart on a roller coaster (drama)…

Photo credit: sarahnealphotography1

… or swoon like a diabetic patient from hypoglycaemia as the hero and heroine (or heroes/ heroines- sexuality is fluid*) ride off into the sunset. Birds are chirping, a light breeze tease their perfectly trimmed bangs. The temperature is a perfect 22 degrees celsius as they gallop past the luminous glittering blue lake under the falling dusk, and romantic melody pipes in the background. And they live HEA (happily ever after)- Romance.

*topic we will explore in the near future.

Photo credit: www.spoilertv.com

“There ARE rules to the genre,” young Jane insist on Jane The Virgin Chapter 54. The flashback features an adolescent Jane at the reading of romance novel The Last Song in Avalon.

As always, Jane comes bearing a list. In this case, a list of points she intend to air with the author. She questions, “I would like to know why Noelle and Jean Luc don’t get together at the end.”

“Well, love doesn’t always work out,” the writer responds with a smile.

“Yeah, in real life. But this is a romance novel. In a romance novel, they get a happily ever after…” Jane is adamant.

“Some romances don’t end happily,” the author’s explains patiently. “Think of Romeo and Juliet.”

“But that’s one of Shakespeare’s tragedies…” Jane continues. “… In tragedies they end up dead; in comedies, they end up happy; and in romance novels, they end up together… You need an HEA” She’s agitated. I don’t blame her. I’m beyond agitated.

There ARE rules to a genre. For example, the love interest does not, after 2 seasons of heart wrenching will-they-won’t-they, a broken engagement, a complicated love triangle, relentless pursuing, selfless friendship, a second engagement, the “Super Bowl of weddings”, get shot by his detective partner, who turns out to be a notorious crime lord in a rubber mask. And just minutes before their much anticipated pilot coitus debut (Jane the virgin finally losing her virginity on her wedding night!). But Michael survives the gunshot to the heart!!

Photo credit: www.tvguide.com

And then, 10 episodes later, he croaks. Cease to exist. Returns to the earth.

Dies.

An unspeakable act that violates every aspect of the romance genre law.

I bawled my eyeballs out silly. More tears were shed than that at the ending of certain BGRs. I waddled in disbelief** and conjured up a dream where Michael lives- a literal dream in between REM cycles.

** Despite the many hints and ground work the writers lay, I stubbornly remained in my state of acute denial.

Photo credit: www.theodysseyonline.com

Of course, the problem arise when the show’s genre is unclear. According to the ever-reliable wikipedia (my entitled opinion), Jane the Virgin is a drama, romantic comedy, telenovela and satire.

Which is a licence to break every rule in the book, right?

NOO, duh!! There are rules in this universe. A nature order of things. Imagine the wrecked havoc if show writers decide to do as they please, like, say, kill Michael off?! What kind of dimwit move is that?!!! Have you no heart? Have you no empathy for your viewers? Don’t you care about ratings???!!

I guess, the nature of their mixed genre grants them creative liberty.

Some fans hold on to the hope that Michael is not really dead. Unfortunately, in my opinion, that doesn’t seem like the direction the writers are heading. But then again, it is a Telenovela, right? You never know.

Till then, I have resolved to boycott the show, and take everybody with me. Nobody can replace Michael. Nobody! And absolutely no-freaking-body can fit the void his death has drilled in my heart…

Somehow, I’m just not as emotionally invested in the show anymore. Even with Tyler Posey’s Adam (#TeamAdam) new appearance, whom I loved on Teen Wolf. 

Then again, this is purely the perspective of a loyal member of #TeamMichael. #TeamRafael is probably having a field day. Mountains of popped champagne cork, I imagine.

And, just for the sake of a stroll down memory lane, here are 107 reasons to ship Jane and Michael:

Because snow makes everything more romantic:

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is how I wish Jane the Virgin ends:

On the same note, How I Met Your Mother is a tragedy, NOT a comedy.

#HellHathNoFurryLikeATeamMichaelfan

Behind Wonder Woman is a Man

Photo credit: www.batman-news.com

P.S. Potential spoilers ahead (limited but palpable).

Wonder Woman is an integral picture of girl power and female empowerment, with legs that go on forever, and a smile that could melt the polar ice caps. She is the epitome of feminism, intrinsicly everything I expected from double W- Wonder Woman.

However, today, I break my own mold. Rather than rave about Diana (Wonder Woman)’s mean round horse kick and fearless demeanour, I urge the limelight unto the man behind the heroine: Steve Trevor.

Because, every woman needs a Steve Trevor.

He is his own man

A spy, pilot, and pretty much all round bad-ass. Steve is not threatened by Diana’s competence. He is comfortable playing second fiddle to a woman. His confidence in his abilities let him recognise that a woman’s strength does not diminish his masculinity.

The public conception that strong woman seek weak man makes me ROFL (Roll On the Floor with Laughter). On the contrary, she is better matched with a man who finds validation in his own fortitude. One whose ego pay little regard to his partner’s caliber.

Let her shine

“I can save today, but you can save the world,” Steve croaked before his to-be suicide mission.

No need to play “big strong man” and save the world, because he is secure enough to take a step back for Diana’s home run. The iconic scene comes to mind when Diana bounds into a shower of bullets, shield in hand, fending off attacks with her bracelets of submission. Steve patiently waits behind while Diana shines in her moment.

A real man is contended cheering from the bleachers and recognise when it’s simply not about him. Although Steven was technically down and dirty all the way, he concedes when the spot light is not his to relish.

RESPECT and faith

If there is a sub-theme, it’s the brassy lack of respect the men in power have for their counterparts. When Steve and Diana barged into a military meeting, we note that the sight of a woman triggers a series of shocked expressions. This is followed by Steve’s superior officer urgently shoo-ing her out the door.

Steve’s respect for Diana is a stark contrast from his peers. His faith in her is set in stone. Although her naiveness draw out his frustration, he never belittles her wishes. He views her as an equal, an ally worthy of reverence.

some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this

But I lucked out (although I don’t believe in luck. I think every occurrence is merely an equal or opposite reaction to a string of consequences based on chances and probability and hence ending in results that is easily altered by any antecedent action).

So perhaps I’m simply attracted to the kind of man I desire (duh!).

What I’m trying to say is…

I found my Steve Trevor.

The Arrow’s Suicide

Ar.row 

[ar-oh]

Verb

  1. To destroy the credibility, quality and eliteness of one’s show.
  2. The act of destruction of one’s show by the introduction of a non ideal romantic couple.

Adjective

  1. The downward spiral of a show that was once great.
Photo credit: www.screenrant.com

Arrow was once the blood that course through my veins. Within 36 hours, I binge watched the entire Season 2 in a Japanese airport hotel room. Each episode had me clenching an iPad mini in one hand, cheese crackers in the other.

But those glory days were a Halley’s comet, came, gone, then lost from sight for 75 years. Come Season 3, the series hit a lamentable plateau, followed by a monstrous, humungous, and colossal plunge.

Over the next 2 season, they made tolerable blips on the rating graphs, sufficient to survive, but a far cry from yesteryear’s majestic splendour.

After careful thought and consideration, I have compiled the 3 ways Arrow shot an arrow into their right foot.

Killing Laurel Lance.

Photo credit: www.accesshollywood.com

R.I.P., Arrow. Congratulations on digging your own grave. After playing “guess the name on the tombstone?” for what feels like eternity, the mystery corpse was unraveled: Laurel Lance, a.k.a. The Black Canary.

Damien Darhk stabs Laurel during battle, she doubles over in pain, face cringed with shock. Later, she passes in a hospital bed. Among her last words to Oliver before she bites the dust are: “I’m really glad you found Felicity. And I hope you find your way back to her. Although I know I’m not the love of your life, you will always be the love of mine”.

Laurel’s last words.

If I may, Laurel is the single most unappreciated character on the show. She watched her father struggle with the bottle, beat alcoholism herself, mourned her sister’s brutal murder, then resurrected said sister. Also, she became the Black Canary. If this show has (had) a package of feminism, grit and strength, it’s Laurel Lance.

And then she went to meet her maker.

The internet exploded with endless opprobrium concerning Laurel’s death, my disgust amongst the many. Really, can you blame us?

Lack of crowd control.

Photo credit: www.moviepilot.com

Oliver, Felicity, John, Curtis, Rory, Wild Dog, Dinah… *pants*… Is that all? And that’s just Team Arrow. Wait till I start on the non team members.

Once, there was Roy Harper’s Arsenal, who was then replaced by Thea Queen. And then Thea quit team Arrow, and they were one man (woman) down.

When Laurel died, Madison McLaughlin’s Evelyn Sharp was introduced when she impersonated Laurel’s Black Canary. And she was there to stay.

Arrow is liken to Massachusetts Mutual Life Insurance Company, whom is reported to have the highest turnover rate of all Fortune 500 companies. Ragman (Rory) came, then also left, and Dinah joined the team.

An overflowing cast could mean lost plot for certain characters, as we observed on Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Fortunately, they arrested the situation before it got out of hand.

Can Arrow arrest the “crowding” situation before it’s too late?

Olicity 

But she did it anyway.

Olicity, the double edge sword of Arrow’s very existence. A scroll through the comment section of Arrow’s Facebook page would reveal a nice split down the middle of the fan base: pro-Olicity, or anti-Olicity (me, not that I still identify as a fan. I’m just one of the many opinionated keyboard warriors determined to make my mark on the internet through my ferocious typing skills).

Some fans suspect that Laurel’s death was a result of the Olicity ship. Although I’m hesitant to place the entire blame on this single theory, I second that it plays a significant role in the decision.

A large portion of Arrow’s plot has been twisted and side tracked, just so to please the former group of fans. As one might have guess, I’m no Felicity fan. I understand her critical role of computer nerd and all round smarty-pants, but maintain that Oliver could seek a more suitable partner, and certainly not at the risk of a distorted storyline.

Sorry, Arrow.

You have failed this fan base.

 

Disclaimer: These claims are based the writer’s personal opinion.

 

Candy Andy: The One That Got Away

Why? Why? Why?!

Why poke the sleeping tiger? Why rock the boat on calm waters? Why stir the pot of settled porridge? Why throw marbles under the steady jogger?

Why bring Candy Andy back and upset the perfect balance of bliss, endearment and sweet kisses?

Photo credit: www.bedloo.com

My ship on 2 Broke Girls sailed in Season 2 when Caroline and Andy (nicknamed Candy Andy because of his candy store) got over themselves and started sucking faces. Andy was the perfect poster boyfriend. He made her laugh, forgave when she budged in to him on a toilet bowl, blah blah blah… And then they broke up. I slipped into a plane of melancholy and despair.

But my hope for a reunion never dwindled.

Then in Season 5, the flame of hope blazed into a bush fire of hope when he strolled passed the girls’ cupcake window and back on the show…

For one episode.

And then he was gone again. Like he never returned.

After two stages of grief: denial and depression, I decided it’s high time for stage 3: acceptance. Surely, there are other fishes in the sea.

And along came Bobby.

Photo credit: www.2paragraphs.com

He’s loving, understanding, and adores Caroline. So I thought, yeah, why not?

I’m starting to dig the chemistry. Maybe I could live with a Bobby and  Caroline junior, running around, eating nose poop, drooling buckets…

When Candy Andy materialises like a phoenix from the ashes in Season 6. Cute, broad shouldered, and SINGLE. And he wants Caroline back. But Caroline has a boyfriend, Bobby.

Problem.

The New Girl Jess-Sam nostalgia is thick in the air.

She choose Bobby.

A decision I do not condemn.

As the Season 6 finale played without a Candy Andy reappearance, I wonder if history will repeat itself. Will he fade into non-existence? Has he vanished within the same breath that he appeared, never to be seen again?

Is he the one that got away?

 

 

 

 

Sex doesn’t sell. Kisses do. And here are my picks for favourite TV kisses:

The sweetest kiss: Kara and Mon El (Supergirl)

Mon El thinks he’s going to die. Kara thinks Mon El is going to die. Kara’s Earth mum thinks Mon El is going to die. I don’t think Mon El is going to die, because what kind of blockhead screen writer pulls on our heartstrings then kills off a love interest… Oh wait, there’s How I Met Your Mother.

Anyway, a deadly virus has infected Mon El. Pale face and dreamy eyes, he puts his palm on Kara’s cheek and utters, “You know, you look beautiful. The weight of all these worlds is on your shoulders”. I expect him to blink twice, shed a tear, and then lay back on that fluffy pillow. But instead, he bends over, and FREAKING KISSES HER! A trickle of saliva remains when they pull apart. But who cares? It’s so sweet!

Spoiler: He doesn’t die.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hF3gkBJ22sY

The most breath taking kissNick and Jess (New Girl)

The kick in this one is the element of surprise. Sure, they have been shooting puppy eyes at each other since the pilot, but I expected the producers to drag the will-they-won’t-they for at least another season or so.

So, here they are, talking about coats, when suddenly, he just grabs her like a man and starts sucking her face. I pride myself in being able to predict these possible entanglements pretty well, so imagine my surprise at the jaw dropping snogging action taking place half feet from my face.

 

The steamiest kiss: Jess and Nick (Also New Girl)

A couple of episodes have come and gone since without the pair expressing any interest in commitment. Therefore, I didn’t expect much from this episode. Jess tells Schmidt and Nick about the faithful day she, um, gave away her flower. Her flower-taker is in town, and she plans to meet him. Nick doesn’t seem very happy about it, and you can cut the tension with a knife.

Just as the escalator is about to clam shut, Nick pushes the doors back, breathes, strides confidently to Jess’ side, and scoops her up in a swoon worthy darling carry. He then carries her back into the loft they share with 2 other people, and plants on her a kiss so steamy, they could boil an egg.

 

The most heart warming kissFitz and Simmons (Marvels Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D)

To be honest, I wasn’t a loyal Fitz and Simmons shipper. Actually, I really wanted her to end up with the astronaut guy. Perhaps because Dillon Casey died such a tragic death on Nikita.

But this kiss is definitely my pick for most heart warming kiss. Fitz nearly drowns, “digs a hole in the universe”, not to mention his death wish style confrontation with bad guys and big guns. All that, just for Jemma Simmons.

Then he finally gets to kiss her. Aaawww…

The most romantic kiss: Peggy Carter and Daniel Sousa (Agent Carter)

Daniel chisels Peggy as bait, and of course she bites. “Got nothing to say? No quick come back?”

So she “comes back”, and attacks him with a “Hollywood kiss”. Fun fact: A Hollywood kiss is one where the concerned parties move their faces but not their lips. And then I rewatched this video so many times it’s unhealthy.

This is my idea of romantic, so sue me.

The sexiest kiss: Sherlock Holmes and Molly Hooper (Sherlock)

This is my all time favourite TV kiss! Sherlock jumps through a glass window, releases a carabiner, fixes his coat, and ruffles his hair. At this point of time, he looks as cool as a cucumber from the freezer, and I nearly bite my tongue chewing too hard on my biscuit.

The entire time, his sights are set on Molly. He strides over, tilts his head, and my heart is thumping so hard I can feel it in my toes. Then, somebody rewrite wikipedia, because HE PLACES ON HER THE SEXIEST KISS MODERN TV HAS EVER SEEN!

Disclaimer: I dig the will-they-won’t-they thrill. And ruffled hair. And elevators. Which is how I arrived at this list. Disagree with me? Do share!

Sherlock Pierced a Hole into My Heart

Warning: Spoilers ahead!

His mental prowess and brilliant deductive skills par with, if not trump, Detective Conan (looks like he’s the standard). In place of bow tie and glasses, he dons a Belstaff coat and trademark deerstalker cap. Although many adaptions surround this legendary character, one takes the cake: BBC’s “Sherlock”.

4 seasons later, I remain dumfounded by Sherlock Holmes’s acute perception and superior deduction. In equal measure, his obnoxious demeanor provides endless entertainment value. His inability to pick up on everyday social cues is astounding, or dare I say? Borderline sexy. A scene when John Watson enlists his help as Best Man comes to mind.

Speaking of John Watson, the loyal sidekick is the Robin to Sherlock’s Batman. I suspect Sherlock will fail to perform at his current proficiency without the support and backing of John. John is not a wallflower, nor a doormat. He is his own man, a solid and sturdy character. His medical background proves instrumental to Sherlock’s sleuthing. I applaud the writers for a job well done shaping John’s caliber.

To aid us through Sherlock’s thought process, virtual words and characters materialize next to his object of interest. For example, upon observing that a lady’s ring is clean, a single word “clean” appears abeam the jewelry. This gives us a sense of Sherlock’s train of thoughts.

Sherlock’s frustration and emotions are painstakingly graphic. When faced with imminent death, his tussle to stay alive is depicted by an enclosed room, followed by his attempts to escape the area. On another occasion, he walks up the wall as a clue to his confusion and frustration. These scenes are vivid, and thoroughly narrate Sherlock’s inner demons.

Also, what is a TV series without some will-they-won’t-they suspense? Molly Hopper works at the morgue where Sherlock frequents. Her crush on Sherlock is as glaring as a full moon on a cloudless night, and fans are divided over the portrayal of her unrequited love. Personally, I admit to being an avid “Sholly” shipper.

As Season 4 drew to an end, my disposition resembled one that got dumped. The season ends on a flexible note, should they choose to discontinue the series, yet presents sufficient pivot for possible continuations. The producers and actors are unable to confirm the future of the show. However, they hint that season 5 (should it come to past) would be a few years along. The series have previously aired with irregular intervals between seasons. Given the actors’ other commitments, this might be the longest wait yet.

As for me, I confess: the series pilot had me pining for a hotter Sherlock. Perchance, one that bears no uncanny resemblance to an otter (superficial, I apologize, Benedict Cumberbatch.). I struggled to apprehend his sex appeal. Naturally, I was flabbergasted at his growth on me. Indifference turned to fancy thereupon awe. So, I took a number behind half of Earth’s female population. Unknowingly, I converted and “set feminism back”. I became a “Cumberbitch”.